Speaking of happiness, happy birthday, Mom! You are the best. For anyone curious, she turns 39 this year (haha).

Happiness. Impossible to define for many, hopefully available to all. I rely heavily on my own experiences and perspective to bring you a great start to your Monday each week. Maybe I read more than I typically do this past week, or maybe I thought I would change it up this Monday. Either way, I threw in a few extra sources for today, please enjoy.

According to the 14^th Dalai Lama, “The purpose of our lives is to be happy.” Everyone deserves happiness. Are you happy?

The ambiguity of happiness is beautiful. It is a broad, unique topic. It is discussed, researched, and pursued by many. Qualifications allude to understanding happiness, but it is the perspective of the individual that shapes it. Happiness is not determined solely by the external. In fact, I know that as feelings of happiness come and go, it is determined heavily by the internal. Happiness may occur seamlessly during times of great health and wealth and less so during hardship. But happiness, I am convinced, is ever present, especially when it appears to be gone.

Here is a message from one of my favorite stories about success, wealth, and happiness:

One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.

About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family. “You aren’t going to catch many fish that way,” said the businessman to the fisherman.

“You should be working rather than lying on the beach!”

The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, “And what will my reward be?”

“Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!” was the businessman’s answer. “And then what will my reward be?” asked the fisherman, still smiling. The businessman replied, “You will make money and you’ll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!”

“And then what will my reward be?” asked the fisherman again.

The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman’s questions. “You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!” he said.

“And then what will my reward be?” repeated the fisherman.

The businessman was getting angry. “Don’t you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!”

Once again the fisherman asked, “And then what will my reward be?”

The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, “Don’t you understand that you can become so rich that you will never have to work for your living again! You can spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won’t have a care in the world!”

The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, “And what do you think I’m doing right now?”

Happiness isn’t a destination. It is a state of mind and a state of being. It is a constant process of the inconstant (bolded this as a small plug for another quote I am proud I came up with).

I think the story of the fisherman and businessman is a bit extreme from both perspectives. Businessmen get a bad rap, I don’t know many that get angry or make assumptions as quickly as this guy above, although I know they exist. I also look forward to being a successful businessman someday, still working on what that will look like.

However, the story touches on a spectrum of satisfaction associated with happiness. The fisherman either already built a fishing empire and the businessman was unaware or the fisherman enjoyed a simpler life than the life that the businessman had decided was the best. But again, assuming the fisherman’s approach is simpler can be incorrect. The stress that comes from lack of opportunity could rival the stress of managing too many opportunities. Hanging out at the beach all day without other options would make me feel trapped. Just like running around managing a fleet of boats and employees would make me feel trapped.

There aren’t enough details to fully understand each man’s circumstances, but it is evident that happiness touches all walks of life and types of people. The sources and structures may be different, but we cannot assume others’ understanding of their happiness.

As biologist Roger Payne said, on the power of paying attention, “Any observant local knows more than any visiting scientist. Always. No exceptions.”

So regardless of the hundreds of times I have asked students if they are happy or what will make them happy in the future, I am the visiting scientist. Their answer will change yearly, daily, even hourly at times. We must be our own observant locals when considering the internal and external factors that contribute to our happiness.

Personally, it would be too stressful to rely on one fishing pole to feed my family every day; even to feed myself every day (most of you know I like to eat). I also think it would be too stressful to work the hours and logistics necessary to build a giant fleet of fishing boats over the course of 20, 30, or 40 years. Some people prefer these extremes, I am happiest in my undefined, middle of the spectrum. I am firmly ambitious and determined, but acknowledge my appreciation for taking a break and relaxing sometimes. I do not always expect everyone to feel happy, but I expect us to recognize that happiness will be present when we need it most.

Make it a fantastic Monday.